Or how to deal with overwhelm?
Do these statements sound familiar to you?
“I really need to eat healthier food this week”
“I should get into meditation - everyone says it will help”
“Should I be doing 10,000 steps or is 7000 enough?”
“I need to do some exercise - I spend a lot of time sitting down”
“I should read more but I can’t find time in my day”
How do you feel when you say these things to yourself? You’re already busy with daily life and then you add in these extra thoughts. When life feels overwhelming and there aren’t enough hours in the day, making time for yourself and what you “should” be doing to take care of yourself can feel impossible. Your mind is already busy and now a lot of judgmental thought is being piled on top.
What if the answer to your mental well-being wasn’t to start doing something new or different, but to give yourself permission to just be in the moment? The truth is: a quiet mind doesn’t come from going for a run or meditating. It comes from the moment you are OK with where you are in the moment and you stop judging yourself. That is when you access true peace of mind.
The moment I give myself the permission to just be doing what I am doing, I find my mind stops going at a million miles an hour and I feel calmer. Even if my thoughts drift, I know they are thoughts, and I don’t need to do anything about them. They are just passing thoughts and they do not last.
From the moment they arrive to the moment we act on them, thoughts take no longer than 150ms. Isn’t that amazing? Just imagine how many thoughts you have each day - some will pass by without you acting on them, whereas others will seem so real you feel compelled to act. However, they are all just thoughts.
When we realise that we live in a reality created by thought, our minds start to quiet down. Reminding myself of this fact is exactly how I can access a meditative state, even with lots of people around me.
So perhaps instead of listening to what other people and messages around you are telling you about how to look after yourself, why not ask yourself what you want to create? What is it that you really want from your life? What do you need to do to get there?
Although we find ourselves picking up and repeating lots of “should”, “must” and “have to” statements, these are often not ours. How do you want to create your day to day experience and your life? Thinking about that is true self care!